When you are in the “honeymoon” stage of marriage there is nothing that your spouse can do that will case you stress. Your spouse can do no wrong and is the best thing since sliced bread was invented. Then suddenly day to day issues begin to seep into your marriage and you start to get a little annoyed at the littlest things your spouse may do. After a few years this mere annoyance turns into something much larger and can begin to case trouble for you and your spouse.
Before these annoyance have a chance to ruin the marriage that you and your spouse have worked so hard to build take a look at these tips. The tips that will be provided will assist you with cooling things down a bit, before the damage us unrepairable.
- Focus On The Positive- Why do we all to often focus only on the negative things in life? If I only had more money, if only my home was bigger, why did my car have to brake down. These are common questions people ask themselves, instead of saying at: at least I have money in the bank, there are many without homes and I should be happy I have a roof over my head, the car may have broken down but once it is fixed I still have it, not everyone can say that. The same should also be applied to your marriage. No one is perfect, so we need to stop expecting our spouse to be. Instead of getting annoyed that they came home from work late, be happy they have a job and work hard to provide for you. Don’t yell when they spend money on something that you think is silly, instead be thankful that you had the money for the purchase and it has made your spouse happy. Instead of thinking and focusing on how your spouse has annoyed you think of all the ways your life has been better because they are a part of it.
- Breathe- There is a lot to this method of calming yourself. Take a few deep breaths and count to ten and you will be surprised at how your perspective returns.
- Discuss, Don’t Fight- If there is an annoyance in your marriage that you just can not take anymore and you feel may get out of control if you keep silent any longer as your spouse if you can sit and discuss it. When you sit with your spouse you want to make sure that you do not get petty and most of all you do not scream or yell. Talk calmly and rationally until you can come to a solution that will suit both of you.
- Do Things To Build Your Relationship - Many people don’t realize the value of taking time out of the day to bond with each other. Participate in a shared interest, go to dinner, or plan a romantic getaway. You will find that your spouse annoys you less when you feel attached to them.
- Make Jokes- It is okay occasionally to use humor when dealing with your spouse. There is nothing wrong with making light of something that they do that annoys you, that is as long as your spouse has a sense of humor. You will most likely find that by turning it into a joke it will diffuse the issues you are having and put it in a whole new light.
Remember, living with the same person day in and day out can become very stressful. Follow these steps and you will find that although some of the annoyances may remain, they will no longer seem as large as they once did.
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